Perry and I remarried in November of 2011. I would love to say I had my happily ever after. I could say it, but I would be telling a HUGE lie! The 1st few weeks are a blur. I think we were all trying to readjust to officially being a family again. We had all been living together in the same house since July, but it seemed different since the wedding. There was a lot of tension still with his family. There was a lot of tension because of my anonymous texter. It was a big adjustment for our boys. They were ready for Christmas break. They were both in high school. Josh was a freshman. Sam was a junior.
In addition to my home life being stressful, work was very stressful as well. The week of our wedding, I was called into work for an emergency, mandatory meeting with my manager. I had been reported by one of my co-workers to corporate for being "mentally unstable" and unsafe to fly. This came about because I had called in and missed a shift of work. Ironically, at this time, I was the most stable I had been in a while. The reason I missed work earlier in the week is because I had not prepared adequately for a half-marathon I had participated in the weekend before my wedding. In reality, I was too sore to work. I could barely walk, much less take care of the sickest of the sick in a helicopter! If you've never looked at the inside of a Bell 206 helicopter, which is what we were flying in at the time, trying to care for a critical patient could be compared with doing yoga in a phonebooth. My manager deemed me competent after our meeting, but I was mad!
We made it through the next few weeks and it is finally December 22, 2011. Prior to this year, I usually scheduled myself to work on Christmas once my children were older. When my children were in their "magical years", I was fortunate enough to work part-time and make my own schedule. I was always there to watch them open their presents. Once they were older, I wanted to be able to re-pay the opportunity for those with younger children. However, this year, I wanted us to all be home together on Christmas. At Lifesaver, we did 24 hours on and 72 hours off. After I worked on the 22nd, I wasn't scheduled to return until the 26th. I was going to have Christmas eve and Christmas day off!
It looked like December 22nd was going to be an easy work day. The weather was predicted to be horrible. Due to safety reasons, we didn't fly during bad weather. The storms were moving into Sylacauga, which is where we were located. To protect the helicopter, the pilot flew it to the hangar which was a very short distance away. The medic and I walked to the hangar to help push it in once he landed. After the helicopter landed and the rotors stopped turning, the medic and I opened the hangar door (think of a very large garage). To move a helicopter, there are wheels that attach to the skids. As I stepped into the hangar, I am told I did a pretty impressive fall. It has been described to me, I landed hip, shoulder, head onto my left side. It had to be described because I was knocked unconscious. The medic and pilot called for an ambulance so I could be evaluated. I was transferred to the local hospital and released.
Perry came to pick me up since I was drugged. It was obvious I didn't tuck and roll, or bounce well! The Christmas I had looked so forward to spending with my family was spent in a narcotic haze in my bed. The only medicine I took before this time was ambien. My sleep schedule stayed messed up from working 24 hr shifts and waking up at all hours during the night while waiting for flights. I had previously been prescribed antidepressants by Dr. P, but as mentioned before, this was the best I had felt mentally in years! I was no longer taking any antidepressants.
The following Monday, I was scheduled to follow up with the company's workers comp physician. I was pretty black and blue on my left side, especially on my hip. I was older and this fall hurt! The workers comp physician wanted me to do two weeks of physical therapy before I returned to work. I thought it was a little overkill, but I didn't balk about it too much because I did hurt badly, and it would've been really hard to contort myself into the required positions to adequately take care of the patients I would be flying.
I was compliant with my therapy and was planning on going back to work as scheduled. Things at home were still not great. We truly had gotten married too soon. I had not gotten over all of Perry's lies. Perry had not truly been able to forgive me for my infidelity. We weren't continuing to lie and cheat on each other anymore, but we weren't letting each other forget about the past either. For example, I would decide to look at his phone records to make sure he hadn't been texting or calling anyone. He would be good there, but I would find naked pictures of DAN in a photo album in his T-Mobile account. Keep in mind, this was 10 years ago. There weren't secret folders on the phone to keep pictures in. They were sent to your online account. I would then lose my sanity and put the pictures in our bedroom and accuse him of wanting to see her instead of me. I would also call DAN'S husband and tell him about the pictures. In retaliation, Perry would be VERY hateful with the things he said to me. He once told me I was as pretty as she was, but she had the "shine" factor because she was always wearing make-up and was always dressed up. Yes, I know it's a miracle he's still alive. I explained to him that's why affairs are fun, and called him a dumbass at least a million times! You don't see the other person at their worst - when they 1st wake up without make-up and dragon breath. You don't see them wearing their favorite warm PJ's the dog has chewed. You don't see them when they are sick, or sad, or furious. You don't hear them poop or puke. I think I finally got my point across to him after morphing into a devil like creature.
My last physical therapy appointment, I arrive and limp in. My therapist noticed and asked what was going on. I told her my left hip was much improved, but I must've pulled a muscle in my right calf. It was hurting when I woke up that morning and had progressively gotten worse all day. She assessed me and told me to immediately go to the ER. I laughed at her. She told me she was serious. She thought I had a blood clot in my right calf. I told her I would know if I had a blood clot. My leg wasn't swollen. My leg wasn't red. My leg wasn't hot. I wasn't a smoker. I wasn't overweight. She reminded me I had recently had an injury and an outpatient procedure (uterine ablation) recently. I finally agreed to go see my primary.
By the time I arrived at the primary's office, they had stopped taking walk-ins. I went back home and woke Perry up. I told him we needed to go to the ER. I was in some pretty serious pain now. He was really not happy I had woken him up early, but off we went to the ER at Brookwood. It was a madhouse. It was a typical ER waiting room. I didn't like being on this side of it either. There were a few pukers. There were a few winter crud gang members wheezing and coughing. Of course there were the one or two that thought falling in the floor would get them back sooner. There I sat in leg pain with Perry bitching non-stop. Every time someone came in and went straight back, he would make it a point to tell me they must've really needed to be there. Finally, it was my turn.
The ER MD didn't seem to think I had a blood clot either, but ordered a venous study. I was taken upstairs by stretcher to the vascular lab and my non-invasive venous study of my right leg started. Not too far into it, the girl performing the study had a shocked look on her face. She then made a phone call to the ER MD. I couldn't make out what she was saying. She walked out of the room, but before she did she looked at me very sternly and said, "DO NOT MOVE YOUR LEGS". She might as well have yelled 'you have a huge clot!' As she was out of the room, I used my cell phone to call my friend Kay to see if she was still at work in the cath lab. I told her what was going on so she could meet me in the ER. I was admitted that night to the cardiac floor, started on IV heparin (a blood thinner) and placed on bedrest. My clot ran from mid calf to my lower right thigh.
I was really scared for the 1st time because of my health. Being a nurse, I kept thinking of the worse case scenarios. I was so worried I was going to bleed out in my brain from being on a blood thinner. If I didn't bleed out, I was afraid the clot was going to break loose and go to my head. I didn't want to have a stroke at 41 years old. Perry definitely wasn't interested in taking care of me the rest of his life. I was frustrated. Perry was frustrated. I couldn't believe all of this had resulted from a fall. Little did I know what series of unfortunate events was going to unravel starting with the fall, starting the next morning.
We all only thought I was a whack-a-doo prior to my injury. I had no idea what such a sudden change in physical health can do to your mental health.
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